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Location: Middle of Nowhere, Northern Ontario, Canada

Wednesday, February 8

The Mole Hunter - Part Two

Tuesday night after work we made a quick stop at Canadian Tire where we stocked up on mouse "treats", mouse traps and more electronic rodent deterents. All the way home I shuddered at the thought of having to enter the mole zone. Holly met us at the door, happy and excited as usual to see us, wagging her little tail so hard that it wiggled her entire body. Our back door entranceway is about 4 feet by 7 feet and we have a couple of trays where we put our boots and shoes. I set the bags down while I scanned the area for any unusual movement, ready to make a run for it if I saw anything. I pulled my slippers out from under the little wooden stool that sits beside the boot trays. Using my feet I gave them a good stomp to turn anything inside them into a pancake. Dave was already over by the fireplace getting the fire going again and Holly was outside for her pee.

Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye I catch the dreaded movement. MOLE!!!! Again, Dave went running for the evil broom and told me to watch where it went so he could go after it. I saw it run in front of the door and then back into the corner and crawl into one of the winter boots. Dave came back and handed the evil broom to me and then opened the door and started tossing boots outside. Holly, of course, chose this moment to return from her pee and came bounding up the stairs to get some love from Mommy and Daddy. She took one look at Mommy standing there with the evil broom and turned tail and ran back out the door.

Dave put one boot on and then realized that he had thrown it's twin outside so he grabbed an unmatching one that was for the correct foot and went outside and closed the door. We managed to coax Holly back in the house but she blasted by me with speed that a Greyhound would be jealous of. He shook all the boots out and still no mole. We were puzzled. WTF? Where did the little bastard get to? Back inside came the boots and we started to put things away. Movement again! This time in front of the closet door and Dave saw it too. With me standing guard with the evil broom, he began pulling shoes and boots out of the closet, shaking each one as he went. When there was a single boot left inside the closet and the entranceway was littered with shoes and boots of every shape and size, he pulled away the final boot fully expecting to find the mole. I was doing my part by perching on the wooden stool with the evil broom as if I was hunting moose from a tree stand. Dave just shook his head but I had his back.

Nothing. No mole, just a mess. We were baffled and he began putting the boots back in the closet. As he reached for one boot a furry little head with beady little eyes peaked out at him. He grabbed the boot and threw it out the door. With mismatched boots he grabbed a running shoe and went out to eliminate the mole. At this point I'm thinking about reality tv. We've got The Mole, Fear Factor and Survivor all rolled into one. Dave beat the daylights out of that tiny little piece of fur. He considered setting it free, but it had found it's way inside once and, as I learned with the cows on my Dad's farm, if there's a place to get through once, they'll get through again, so it was lights out for mr mole.

Feeling slightly better about things I settled into my lazyboy chair to read the paper and have a drink. Dave went about setting the new traps in places that Miss Holly couldn't get to. Thirty minutes later I hear the unmistakable sound of a mouse trap snapping the neck of a rodent. Mole number two had gone to the big mole hole in the sky. Excellent. There can't be more, can there? Just to be safe the trap is reset and I start to relax. I was still pretty cautious where I stepped and turned lights on wherever I went. I had a load of laundry in the dryer and noticed that the laundry room was quite humid so I had Dave check the vent and sure enough, it had come loose. I'm really hoping that's where they were coming in. With the dryer vent rehooked I went to bed hoping not to be awoken in the middle of the night by the sound of snapping mouse traps.

This morning I once again gave my slippers a good kick before sticking my bare feet inside them. I'm getting jumpy now. Holly brushed up against me and I jumped about a foot off the ground. Nothing in the traps but Dave saw another mole run through the living room. Fuck! This time Holly saw it too. She immediately shifted into Holly Hunter mode. For her, this was the coolest thing going. During the summer she spends hours at the cottage hunting chippys and squirrels. Not that she'd know what to do if she caught one but she loved to hunt them just the same. Indoor squirrel hunting in the middle of February is probably on par with sitting on a Caribbean beach with a frosty drink for us.

Dave and I left for work. I shuddered at the thought of her actually catching one and chewing on it all day while we were at work. Dave, being a male, pulled the couch out from the wall so that Holly would have more room for the chase.

To be continued...


Blogger mm said...

Oh goodness. I can't believe there was more than one. How do they do that? Are they like ants, and they send one in to scout everything out, and come back with more??

Wed. Feb. 08, 07:27:00 p.m. EST  
Blogger Bravie said...

to be continued? you mean there are more moles? holy heck.

Wed. Feb. 08, 08:12:00 p.m. EST  
Blogger ~Nutz said...

Ewww, ewww, eeeek!

*shivers* @ the thought of gushy mole guts inside my boots, shoes & slippers.

Wed. Feb. 08, 08:33:00 p.m. EST  
Blogger Monstah said...

Thought you were suppose to whack' em?

*takes out large q-tip like stick and whacks Lightsy*

Thu. Feb. 09, 08:12:00 a.m. EST  
Blogger Swami said...

Well, I hope Holly can either catch the sucker or annoy it into leaving.

We have a metal drier-guard grate screwed to the outside wall of our house. It never comes loose & mouse-sized critters can't squeeze through it.

I'm sure Canadian Tire would have one. They're cheap.

Thu. Feb. 09, 09:21:00 a.m. EST  
Blogger bobdechemist said...

*giggle fits*

And it's true you probebly have a lot. By the time you see them in daylight, there must be a tonne of them.


Sleeping in shoes, nesting in the mixing bowls, watching your tv, etc...

Thu. Feb. 09, 01:26:00 p.m. EST  
Blogger lights said...

Name change. BobdeClown is now BobdeBigMeanieStupidHead.

Thu. Feb. 09, 02:21:00 p.m. EST  
Blogger bobdechemist said...

It's funny because it's not my house.

*laughs and laughs*

Thu. Feb. 09, 04:18:00 p.m. EST  
Blogger momma said...



Thu. Feb. 09, 05:28:00 p.m. EST  
Blogger lights said...

*lures all the moles into a box and ships it off to Bob's house*


Thu. Feb. 09, 08:00:00 p.m. EST  

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